What I Teach

“A teacher is a student who teaches to continue her study.”

I love helping people discover their gifts and create a life philosophy and way of being that helps them flourish, be well, and contribute to the greater good in this world.

I believe that life is a journey of hard and sweet, and so much of our experience is informed by how we think, how we feel, and how we choose to show up in the world.

I am committed to the path of emotional and physical health and wellness, and lighting the way towards what is possible.

I love depth, breadth, messy, beautiful, meaningful, authentic, vulnerable, courageous, intentional, strong, and real. In short, this is what it means to be human.

I believe that most of us never feel good enough, we hide more than we show up, we desire connection but avoid being vulnerable, and we steer clear of discomfort even though it is the currency of a life well-lived.

I am committed to helping you find your way back to yourself, learn how to feel any and all things, think and move in a way that serves you, and guide you back to being courageous and whole hearted again.

Join me for a monthly coaching package where you and I can be an unbeatable team: I can help you find your footing, teach you skills to navigate life consciously and confidently, and gently help you rise to that next level of growth so that you can keep on realizing your potential. xx #cheerstoyou #cheerstothejourneyofbeinghuman

You're Worth It

“I’m taking the winter sports season off,” said my high school senior, Ellie, who has had an overflowing plate and tightly structured schedule of academics, extracurriculars, and overall LIFE these last 4 years. This kind of scheduled intensity is not atypical for many of the high school and college students with whom I work.

Most days, Ellie is on from the moment she wakes up before 7am, until she rests her weary head and body in her bed at night, often past midnight. Her to-do list never ends. It just spirals onward, with no end in sight.

“Wow. The winter season? No team involvement? Nothing? A blank slate?” I asked. She nodded.

Then I asked, “That’s a big deal, Elles. It sounds wonderful. What are you going to do with that unstructured time?”

She smiled and said, “I am going to do my own thing…do my own workouts. I’m not sure what it looks like yet but I am ready to give it a try.”

Three months. Ninety days. Many, many hours. All of that open space to breathe, to move with her own agenda, and decide what is on tap for that particular day’s workout, for that particular two hours a day. Such a treat.

I asked Ellie, “Was it difficult to make this decision to step off the known path, clear your schedule, and make time for you?”

She told me, “In many ways, yes. It took some courage. I had to pull the trigger and back away from swimming which I will miss — especially the people.” She paused. “But I knew… if I wanted these few months for myself, then I needed to claim it. I don’t see having this opportunity again for quite some time. Nobody is ever going to give this time to me. I had to give it to myself.”

I’ve been thinking about that conversation with Ellie for the last several weeks. Her words keep replaying inside my head: I had to give it to myself.

When there is a window of time where structure and activities are not dictating where and what we need to be doing in every moment, there is this unfamiliar open space. Who are we outside of all of our roles? Our agendas? What do we need to give back to ourselves? What is our heart longing for? What do we want? Who are we in the midst of this world in which we walk and inhabit?

If I were to think and dream along the lines of what I would do with some free, unplanned time each day: My heart longs for thirty minutes every morning to drink coffee in my pajamas, be with my thoughts, and soak in the peace and quiet (or hang with my hubby if he is in town and up for a cup of joe! ) — thirty minutes of solitude before I wake the kids up and begin the day’s agenda/work. I would love time to focus and immerse myself in developing a 4-6 week program for my clients for 2019. Maybe one month to learn how to pull together a podcast. I would relish reading a few books and writing a steady stream of blog posts. When friends call or family comes to visit, I want the ability to say “Absolutely!” instead of “I’m not sure I am able to pull it off.” And like Ellie, I want time to be still and do whatever my heart desires in that day and moment, without an agenda dictating my next move.

Who’s going to give me that blessing of time?

Nobody except me.

And who’s going to grant you the time that you are starved for — time to journal, time to breathe, time to go for a walk, time to learn how to cook, time to read a novel, time to hang with a dear friend, time to be in conversation with yourself and ask questions, time to ask yourself who am I?, time to sit quietly and contemplate what it all means?

Nobody except you.

The time that you long for. The time that your whole being is aching to take back. The gift that’s priceless, more than honoring the checklist, and recognition and praise, more than anything.

Give it to yourself. You’re worth it.

The Power of a Good Question

What is meaningful? What is true? What really matters in our often busy, chaotic, loud, and convoluted world? How do we have the conversations with ourselves and our children that further us? Help us grow in self-awareness? Empathy? Kindness? Curiosity? Perspective?

The power of a good question can make the difference between a common exchange and one that goes a step or two deeper. Asking good questions is an art, and when we come from a place of curiosity and a desire to learn, the questions flow organically. There is no set agenda, no facade to maintain. It is about connection, courage, and vulnerability. Why not try asking some different questions to have a more substantive and meaningful exchange?

Tell me when you were brave today.

Tell me when you witnessed someone else being brave.

Did you experience kindness today?

When did you feel most loved today?

How did you make the world better today?

Where does confidence come from?

With whom did you sit at lunch? Is there anyone that you are aware of that could use a lunch partner tomorrow?

If you disagreed with what someone said today, did you ask questions to gain understanding and common ground or did you choose to stay quiet?

Where is connection created? In acceptance or in judgment?

Do you think the quality of your relationship with someone is about what they do for you, or what your thoughts are about them and how you feel when you think those thoughts?

Is it easier to love someone or tear them down? Which do you choose?

How do you cultivate happiness and a sense of good enough? Is it an inside job?

Do you think that the currency of your dreams resides in your willingness to move through discomfort, or to stay safe and in the familiar?

How do you navigate discomfort?

How many times did you feel uncomfortable today? Tell me more.

What are 5 things that you love about yourself? Here are 5 things that I love about you.

Did you question something today? What was it?

Do you think you are born with resiliency or is it a muscle that you build by doing hard things?

Commit to 5 minutes of self care for the next 10 days. No negotiation. What would that entail?

To whom did you compare yourself today and why? Was it based in harsh judgment or curiosity?

What are you thinking about a person and/or circumstance in your life that is challenging you?

How do you feel when you think that thought?

Who are you, and how do you behave when you think that thought?

Who would you be without that thought?

What is the solution?

Are thoughts self-fulfilling prophecies?

Do you think people’s actions and behaviors are about you or about them?

Is it your business to know what other people think about you?

How much energy are you putting toward being liked versus being yourself?

With whom do you feel most at home?

What brings you joy? What lights you up?

What have you learned about yourself in the last week that you didn’t know before?

What is one thing that you can do differently that will get you closer to what you want in your life? What is holding you back from doing it? Why?

Do you want my advice or my support?

Did you know that I love you? All of you? Every part of you? Even those parts of you that are hard to love? Especially those parts? I do.

Really? #tellmemore