As parents, we are in the business of raising solid, resilient, awesome humans. It is no small task. We are their models, guides, and mentors, and we set the example of what is possible. They learn from us, the imperfect perfect humans that we are. Sometimes, I think they learn as much about what they don’t want to be from us as much as what they do want to be. My Dad always use to say that each generation has the opportunity to stand on the shoulders of the previous one, and transcend generational patterns and behaviors that are no longer serving us. These patterns can take on many forms, and the familial patterns that I often see in my coaching practice are addiction, denial, avoidance, secrecy, depression, and abuse. If we’re doing it right, we are committed to doing our own inner work so that we are operating from a place of awareness and wellness, and when we need help, we seek it out. Best of all? Our children bear witness to our practices and learn how to lay the foundation for a life well-lived.
There are a myriad of ways to model for our children how to move in this world from a healthy and whole place: how to be in relationship with self and with others, how to meet our own emotional needs, how to feel and manage painful emotions, how to forgive, how to communicate, how to be kind, and how to cultivate and contribute our gifts to the world. They are learning from us all the time. The more we return to ourselves and remember who we were before the world got its hands on us, the more capable we are in keeping that door open for our children and guiding them in their own process of becoming.
We cannot control our young people. So instead of trying to dictate who they are and who they need to become, why not focus our energies on becoming the best that we can be and get to know who our young people are and get to know who they want to become and guide them in the unfolding. #trusttheprocess #curiositynotjudgment #excavatedontobfiscate #wellnessbegetswellness