Last week, there was a common theme running through the majority of my sessions with clients, and it was about clear, confident, and effective communication. Good communication is the gateway to healthy relationships so it is a worthwhile skill to cultivate.
The best way to go about seeking connection with others is to practice being thoughtful and clear with your words and the motivation behind them. Why are you saying what you are saying, and what are you trying to get across? Once you are clear on these things, if someone misinterprets your words or intentions, take time to say what you mean as specifically and honestly as possible. A good way to ensure that you have been heard accurately is to ask, "Tell me what you heard me say and what you are making it mean?" If what comes back to you is not what you were going for, try try try again. Risk being misinterpreted so that you can ultimately be heard and experience connection with others.
The most effective communication occurs when you clean up you own emotional thoughts and opinions about things, and take responsibility for the end result. Speak your truth, and do so in a kind and respectful way. And instead of dwelling on what someone did or didn't say or do in response, focus on what needs to happen to improve the situation. Don't walk away. Connection is always possible, the delivery just might need an extra dose of clarity and confidence to be heard. x